As a Christian single over 50, I have a unique perspective…I think anyway. There are probably so many lessons I’ve learned throughout my life. I’ve…
As a Christian single over 50, I have a unique perspective...I think anyway. There are probably so many lessons I've learned throughout my life. I've been a Christian single person that entire time. Some of the lessons I've learned are good ones. Other were a bit harder.
I'll do my best to share this with other Christian singles who get access to my story.
For starters, I have seen many friends and family members who dove into marriage at an early age. There's nothing wrong with that. Some of them have had successful walks in their life with a mate that worked out well for them. Many haven't done so well. They will tell you they regret the "quick decision" they made to get married. I've seen situations where it was someone they thought was right for them, but it was someone they were NOT correctly "yoked with."
I need to include this disclaimer. Once married, the person you marry IS the person God, has you. Having this lack of spiritual alignment with your married partner isn't an excuse to leave. Sadly, many people I know thought they married a great solid believer. Later on, they realized their mate may not have really walked with the Lord the way they thought.
I've been blessed by God in my own life. He's spared me from a few "unwise marriage possibilities" that in hindsight would have been a disaster. I have stayed in contact with them and I have become aware of the person's lifestyle and have seen how they have walked away from the Lord. So God has protected me to remain a Christian single and has kept me from ending up in a train wreck that could have been a part of my marriage. He has spared me and for that I am grateful.
Now let's talk about the downside. I have had a lot of contentment through the decades. I have had the opportunity to travel for fun and for missions. I have had a good amount of freedom, and all the things that come with being a Christian single I get independence. But as I reach my half-century mark (and wow, does that sounds crazy, ha!), I'm seeing what I may have missed. That's why I'm still considering how to find that mate for me. This has become more important for me. A big reason is that being alone is definitely more difficult. That can be financially, emotionally, spiritually, etc.
Being alone can be, well, lonely. I look around and see all of my married friends are quite busy with their own kids, grandkids, etc., My single life is so different from theirs. I sometimes I feel like an outsider.
Thankfully, this outlook doesn't fill my whole thought process. It does not consume me. I am so grateful for my church. It knows how to focus on the person and their identity as a child of Christ, instead of the many churches that focus on exact walks in life and categorize people.
As you may have experienced as Christian singles, you run into the "what-do-we-do-with-this" person as church. It's that uncomfortable not fitting in a church situation. My advice is to go and find a congregation that can treat you like an equal citizen, not a second-class citizen. Find one that will love and encourage you in your walk with the Lord, not your exact circumstances. Your Christian single ness shouldn't be what defines you anyway!
May God graciously carry me through this life, whether single or married, with the perspective that He is my partner, whether single or married ❤️
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